tmi thursday

***no children should view the following due to the graphic nature of this post.***

tmi thursday people.

i found this through the exhotgirl but another girl started it. so thanks to them i will be posting something so horrendous today, so spine-tingling, that you will not be able to finish reading this post. and to make it extra tmi, i am including pics.

yes people, i am that tmi chick that doesn't care if her biggest secret is looked upon as weird or insane. i am that girl that has the ability to make you click out of this post so fast with her oddness that you may never come back. and if you look at me differently after this, i will totally understand.

but that is what tmi thursday is about, no?

*le sigh*

i have the ability to talk to stuffed animals. yes. you read right. that was not a ufo flying overhead that interrupted your computer monitor as your eyes were scanning this post for the dirty little secret. i.talk.to.stuffed.animals.

we have coffee in the morning. long meaningful conversations. trust me. it's totally.healthy. to share your innermost thoughts with someone who's not going to try to break it down and tell you stuff you're not ready to hear.

it's like an addiction. a love affair, if you may.

they don't talk back. they aren't greedy. they don't demand every second of my time. they aren't annoying [unless they quack or moo or ribbit!--but that's normally the puppet ones and you have to stick your hand up their whoops! in order for that to happen!]

but there is one stuffed friend i have. we go wayyyyyy back:

elmo & myself. circa 97. i was 16 and infatuated. what can i say? his giggles are contagious.

sometimes though, he can be sooooo annoying. he talks wayyyy too much. my old 28 year old ears are too sensitive for his high pitched voice.

this morning, he was just yakking away and i was trying really hard to not cry at the nail-screeching sound of his words. he particularly likes the "hokey pokey" and to try to show me what "it's" all about. but i don't swing that way so he gives me the stank eye!

excuuuuuuuuuuse moi!

so i gave it to him right back!

he tried to come back at me with some elm-attitude. but i sure showed him!

he just went from tickle me elmo to kick my ass elmo is 5 seconds flat.

teach him* to give me the stank eye again!!!

*no elmos were harmed in the making of this tmi post. he was removed from the shape sorter and placed carefully back into his usually spot until we can reach some kind of agreement in the morning over some irish cream roast. until then, his ass remains on the shelf so high that if he tried to come down, he'd rip a hole in his fur or tear off a limb. or rip out an eye...or some shit like that...